Got to Dance

I love "Got to Dance", currently occupying your TV screens on Sky 1 on Sunday evenings. It's kind of like "The X Factor", but for dancers, and without the cruelty. Or the ego that is Simon Cowell.

The format is fairly typical of many "talent quest" shows that are on TV now - we see auditions for the first few weeks of programmes, then we get an episode where the judges decide who will make it through to the next stage, and they go and tell those people who we have seen in the auditions round to tell them the good or bad news, then we have the live semi-finals, with public voting, and eventually we'll be at the live final 'extravaganza'.


What makes this different is, mostly, little things, but it makes the viewing experience much nicer, and less like the "freak show" that, for example, "The X Factor", often becomes. There is an unseen round of producers auditions, where the acts perform in front of the shows producers, not the judges, and they do seem to have eliminated most of the no-hopers, meaning that the quality of the act you see in the audition shows is already high.

The judges know their stuff. Oh boy, do they know their stuff. Ashley Banjo, from all conquering "street crew" Diversity, Kimberley Wyatt, survivor of The Pussycat Dolls, and Adam Garcia, tap supremo. I admit to being a little bit swoon-some about Adam. He's hot, he's got a cute accent, and have you seen what that man can do in a pair of tap shoes? Hell, I'd kill just to dance with him, let alone anything more fruity! This year, there was a "warm up show" before the series officially started, and they sent the judges back to their homes, to show you where they came from, and the extent of their dance background. This shows the hard work and dedication needed to get to the top of the dance industry, and hopefully gives the audience both a firmer grasp on the hard work and years of toil needed, and an appreciation of the sort of skill levels we are seeing on the stage throughout the auditions.

It's also not too long. The whole thing has, in terms of Sunday evenings, been running since the first weekend in January, and will finish with the Final on 4th March. The whole thing is done and dusted in two months - it doesn't drag on from August till December. They have, this year, introduced a weekday early evening show, which features expanded footage of the auditions. From this it becomes obvious that the judges really are trying to give constructive criticism, and they aren't there to stroke their own egos. We've also seen both Ashley and Adam have a go at pole dancing, and Kimberley getting to do her "Diva Strut", which she is really exceptionally good at.

We're at semi-final stage right now, with the acts for the final being chosen by the public. I'm not sure the judges have always chosen the right acts to go through to the semis, but then there is of course a large element of personal preference at work here, and they only get to see each act twice (once at the auditions, once in review on tape), and we don't know whether some of the people who made it onto "the judge's shortlist" subsequently drop out, or get disqualified, or if the producers give them quotas for dance styles to be in the finals which effect the decision.

But, you do get to come back next year if you don't win, even if you've been to a the semi-final stage previously. I like this, it encourages development, and we've seen this year a lad - "Luke" - who did well last year, subsequently got a place at a dance school, and has come back this year greatly improved. He's still in his teenage years - he's going to be frighteningly talented in a few years time, and could be a great dancer if he chooses to stay with it - and I hope he does.

"Got to Dance" is thoroughly entertaining, without resorting to the cruelty we so often see in these types of shows. The judges really, really know their stuff, and are also grounded enough to know that it's not about them, but about trying to find a great dancer. Davina is nice to the contestants, without being patronising, and there's a great air of encouragement surrounding the whole thing. If you've avoided it because it's on Sky 1, you might want to rethink your early Sunday evening viewing, before you're too late for this year.

Pineapples are not the only fruit

I kind of stopped watching Big Brother and it's various spin offs a few years ago - I just sort of grew away from it really. I always kind of kept an eye on who was on the celebrity version ("CBB") just for voyeurism's sake.

CBB is back now, on Channel 5, and I only half noticed who the cast mates were. Mr Annelle turned the TV onto Channel 5 by accident on Sunday, to discover that Andrew Stone was one of the inmates. Now, "Pineapple Dance Studios", and it's follow up "Louis Spence's Showbusiness" ("LSS") are two of my most recent TV guilty pleasures. As you may be able to tell from my limited entries on here, I like Dance, and my obsession with Pineapple extends to the ownership of two tops, a bag and a following of now ex-receptionist Laura Pye on Twitter. Andrew Stone was one of the featured members of staff on Pineapple and LSS. He is portrayed as a serious wannabe, a self styled "Triple Threat" (genuine 'Industry Speak' for someone who can Dance, Sing and Act) and the front man of the frankly comically mediocre band "Starman". I suspect some editorial bias here - the producers already had "the wacky camp guy" in Louis, and Andrew can't compete with that. So he was portrayed as the seriously delusional ego-maniac instead.

Those people who are granted access to my highly infrequent and often cryptic musings on Facebook, will have been aware that in November, I spent a weekend in London. I wasn't going to waste the opportunity, and on the Thursday evening rocked up at Pineapple intending to participate in Andrew's "R'n'B Jazz" class.

I was greeted by Giles, who also featured in Pineapple and LSS. I managed to maintain my composure and not be a weird fan girl for long enough to engage in conversation about the suitability of the class, pay my door fee, listen to the directions to the changing room and the Studio I needed, and then I was in!

I was early, very early, and so had enough time to change at my leisure in the frankly very nice ladies changing rooms - much nicer than they seem on TV.  The changing rooms were in the basement. The studio I needed was on the 2nd Floor. It is a long way up, and the stairs were very, very steep. I was, to be frank, out of breath by the time I got up to the appointed space. A few minutes later, Andrew arrived. His hair was just plain brown, with none of the highlights the TV audience is so used to. He seemed polite and keen, and a little bit cheeky.

I am used to dance classes of this style, if even very vaguely, but was also well aware that I was out of shape and at the end of three days of intense activity in the day time. The lights went down, the music went up (J Lo's "Dance on the Floor" - I had it in my head for the next 24 hours) and we started sweating. Given Andrew's slight celebrity status, and the relatively good time of the class (6pm) I was surprised that, even allowing for late arrivals, there were only 7 of us plus Andrew. Pineapple works by hiring their rooms to the teachers for the hour of the class - they also publish their hire rates on their website, and assuming that there isn't any discounts for teachers, I suspect he made very little, if anything from this hour.

I was knackered by the end of the warm up, and when we got on to sit-ups (a favoured warm up of some dance teachers), I was ready to sleep the sleep of the just. Andrew by this point was dripping with sweat. The two girls at the front who were obviously class and club regulars were doing just fine keeping up, myself and the other newbies at the back were panting along showing willing. We then moved onto the routine, which was challenging but achievable. It involved some frankly scary floorwork, but we only had to handle that in the last section of the class. We then did the usual showing of the routine - the two regulars were fab, the rest of us were enthusiastic.

And so, what did I think of Andrew? He is very, very good. He knows what he is doing, and the attitude that comes across on TV as cocky, is because he knows he is good, and because he is just absolutely oozing passion for what he does. He is physically very fit, and given that he is 39 now, his stamina and ability to still be carrying on in dance, especially with the intensity he demonstrated here, is very impressive. He wants to show you how to do what he can, and he wants you to know that he loves this, and you should too. He has obviously had some classical dance training, and he actually corrected my technique on a couple of occasions, something which is often lacking in classes of this type. I had an absolutely fabulous time - when I am next in London, I will go to his class again.

Oh, and the "but is he gay?" question. Hmm. On reflection, I don't think he is gay. He's certainly very camp, but then he's been in showbiz for about 20 years, and the insanity of that business does rub off on you eventually. In essence, if you and I didn't spend 8 hours a day engaged in the 9-5, with a commute at either end, we'd probably be as wildly keen about our lives and our daily experiences as Andrew is. We could probably all learn a lot from this - this is how you get to live your life if you haven't had the passion and joy sucked out of your life by the brutality of the mortgage, the school run and the horror of the weekly supermarket shop. "Camp" is different to "Gay", and actually, I don't think he is all that "camp" - as I say, he just obviously loves what he does and exudes that joy and passion in a way that can be, and seemingly frequently is, subject to mis-interpretation.

As I write this, Andrew has just been evicted from the CBB house, to a decidedly mixed reaction. He's taken it quite well, I just hope he doesn't do anything foolish, publicity wise, over the next few days, in response to that.

And at least he'll be able to teach his class at Pineapple tomorrow night!

Strictly - The Post-Mortem

I am glad that Harry won. I would have been fine with Chelsee winning as well, as I think they were both very, very good. I think Chelsee probably had slightly harder routines overall.

I intended to post after every show, but a severe lack of time, and annoyance with the first few weeks results put me off. Edwina should not have been the first to go - Lulu "face like it has been smacked with a lemon" should have gone before her, as should Nancy, who was truly, utterly appalling. And Alex Jones should not have  been far behind them. I have no idea how Alex got as far as she did, she was poor technically for most of the dances and, to be frank, looked like she didn't want to be there until about week 6. I certainly felt that Rory and Dan, who appeared to be really trying, should have been rewarded with more opportunities to improve. Russell Grant went at about the right time - just before the public tired of him, and when they realised that as enthusiastic as he was (and boy, was he enthusiastic), he wasn't actually very good.

The Wembley show appeared to be mostly pointless, other than as an excuse to raise money for Children in Need, or more likely, suggests cynical old me, to act as an extended trailer for the forthcoming SCD Tour. Which, intriguingly, won't feature Ola and James Jordan. There seems to be a suggestion that their respective celebs couldn't make it - you can see that Alex Jones needs to be on The One Show sofa every night, and that Robbie has other fish to fry, but you'd have thought that there would have been something for them to do. The suggestions from stupid people on the Daily Mail forums who haven't read the story properly, is that they wouldn't watch the show if Ola wasn't in it, and even though they have missed the point entirely, I do wonder how much of an impact not including two very popular and technically exceptional celebs is going to have.

So, to sum up, I was pleased with the overall result, but disappointed with the elimination order. There is, I suspect, little that can be done about this, other than that the Judges fix their scores to try to put the useless people in the "danger zone" of the middle of the leader board. And I'm not sure the judges would be prepared to do that. Also, there needs to be less of Bruce's awful, awful jokes, and more of Claudia, who was mostly woefully underused this year, and missed out on the last weekend altogether. Also, a "round up" episode of It Takes Two on the Sunday evening, to interview the runner up and the winner, and show some highlights and back stage stuff, as it always feels so rushed in the final results show.

Overall then, I was happy with my "guilty pleasure" TV this year, but felt a few things could be tweaked. And Charlie Brooks was by far the best dancer, and therefore a worthy winner of the Christmas Special. And, for thelove of all that is holy, could someone give Anton someone who stands a fighting chance next year, he must be wondering who he has offended at the Beeb to get this much of a run of duds.

SCD - Weekend 2

OK, yes, it's almost a week late, we're almost ready for tonight's show. But I was away, and I've been ill. So ill that I've been to the quacks and got some drugs, and been off work AGAIN.

So, here's a very quick summary:

Tess' dresses - not bad at all. Obviously this is unacceptable, and Claudia was made to pay during the results show by being dressed in a matt bin bag. Hideous!

In the following catergories then:

Very Good:
Jason, Harry McFly, Chelsee

Having the time of their life:
Anita Dobson, Russell Grant

Greatly improved:
Robbie Savage, Alex Jones

Average:
Holly, Dan Lobb from ITV, Audley Harrison, Rory Bremner (couldn't pick out the impersonation this week, might have been doing it as himself)

Absolutely Awful:
Edwina Currie, Lulu, Nancy Dell'olio.


Should Edwina have gone? No. She had patronising choreography, again, and Len never likes faffing around with props, which won't have helped, but for my money, she wasn't as bad as Lulu, who had to be practically dragged round the floor by Brendan, and with half of it in practise hold. I'm disappointed. Before this started I had high hopes for her, but two weeks of being poor on the bounce, and I suspect she won't be with us for long. Even the awful Nancy will outlast her at this rate (although hopefully not by much) and whilst I feel sorry for Anton, who never gets an even break in this show, I won't miss her when she goes. I think Edwina could have lasted longer with better choreography. I actually think they should have put her with Anton, and Nancy with Vincent. I think that would have resulted in better outcomes for all concerned.

Good to see Will Young in the results show, and a nice, if somewhat frantic professional show dance. Bring on tonight, when I expect a small rash of jokes about Sir Brucie having actually received his gong this week.

Strictly - The First Weekend - part 2

And so, on to Saturday. We get a brief recap of the previous night’s dance based shenanigans, and then everyone trips down the stairs in what I think was the same order as last night, but in a whole truck load of different outfits. I hope we’re going to see some of those on the dance floor – this show must cost a fortune in dress material alone.

We start this evening with Harry McFly (I’m going to call him that all the way through btw) doing his Cha Cha Cha. And my word, the jokes about having to punch the instructions into a drummer need to be set aside here – he’s not half bad is our boy band rhythm basher, and the audience love it, rewarding him with the first of many standing ovations we get tonight. Then we have Rory Bremner, who did a waltz, with Erin. He did it as Tony Blair. Really, go look at the footage again, it’s bizarre.  Erin really deserves to go a long way in this competition, but they continually pair her with celebs who are useless. Let’s hope Rory manages to do an impression of a dancer for long enough to give Erin a fair crack at the Glitter Ball.

Alex Jones next. She’s going for sexy flirting over dance ability – point your bloomin toes woman, for goodness sake. Sex appeal only ever gets people so far in this competition.  James Jordan her partner has a pop at Judge Craig, even though Craig was making some valid points. The arguing has therefore started very early this year, again increasing the effect that SCD is going down the slippery slope towards soap-dom. I want something more intelligent from my broadcasting. And I realise I’m asking this of a pro-celebrity dance show. But why must we always talk down to the audience? Why can’t we just show a dance contest, with constructive criticism from judges who aren’t playing to a baying mob, and where the person who is the best dancer is the eventual winner.

And then onto Chelsee from Waterloo Road, who does an absolutely manic waltz with new guy Pasha. The judges picked up on the manic-ness but also picked up on how difficult that all was for her.This is the second year running that there has been someone from Waterloo Road on, and they really need to stop portraying those actresses like they are thick Northern Chavs. At this point, and following the “James incident” Craig started being ineffectual with his comments and really, really quite harsh with his points. There’s just no need for it, and it spoils the show, both for us as viewers and the celebs taking part, who must get disheartened.

And then on to Nancy and Anton. Poor, poor Anton, who, rather like his professional partner Erin, always seems to get the thin end of the wedge. Nancy was just awful, complete stuff up with the feather boa notwithstanding. And she’s not even going to get the “Ann Widdecombe” vote either. No, that, on this performance, will go to Edwina. What on earth was Vincent thinking? There seems to be a certain school of thought (and Anton did it too) that “older” women – and by that, I mean anyone over the age of about 40, which isn’t old, but these people seem to think it is – and BREATHE!, can’t do any serious dancing. James showed that to be wrong last year with Pamela. Anita was having fun but doing serious choreography the previous night, Brendan looks like he’s trying to do something similar with Lulu. But Anton and now Vincent, seem to think, somehow, that “older” means “comedy”, that they can’t do serious choreography and that the celebs can’t and won’t be any good. This is plainly nonsense – Pamela got to the last three last year, and she was in her 60s. June Brown did the Christmas Special last year in her 80s (yes, obviously, that’s different to an entire series, but she is in her 80s, and they gave her a flattering frock and nice, admittedly gentle choreography, and a relatively long rehearsal time, but it’s still a valid point). It is yet another thing that is making this show more like a soap, and less like an entertainment show.

We finished with the other Aussie, the lovely Jason Donovan (yes, I’m biased). He was also good, but having seen the footage of the launch show dance rehearsals, we’d expect nothing less. The Priscilla experience appears to have given him the confidence to be just camp enough without overdoing it. He has obviously practised and practised and practised, and it really showed, in a performance that ended the show on a high after a run of lacklustre and bizarre performances – irrespective of how the baying mob of an audience may have been encouraged to respond.

Look, I like SCD, I really do, don’t let this entry make you think otherwise. I’ll be watching it until the end of the season to see who wins, although there may well be some weeks where I fast forward through the padding to get to the meat of the actual dancing. But I worry that in trying to persuade some people who are watching the X Factor on ITV to try SCD instead, they are dumbing the show down. Here’s the thing, X Factor has viewing figures of what – somewhere between 10 and 12 million. That leaves about 50 million people who aren’t watching the X Factor, for the BBC to go after. Perhaps, if they didn’t try to dilute the format, to make it a parody of itself, to reduce everything to “Craig is the nasty judge”, “Anton never wins” then perhaps the viewing figures might increase. Let the viewer decide for themselves, don’t lead them with heavily edited interview clips and rehearsal footage. Don’t try to influence people with the costumes the celebs are put in (Chelsee’s Launch Show Hot Pants – anything Edwina’s worn so far, including that god awful necklace from Saturday). Let the audience decide for themselves, and we may get a better, less formulaic show because of it.

I know that “we” in the “dance community” are supposed to be grateful that we even have dance on “primetime TV”, to just accept it if the whole thing is reduced to the level of a talent contest where the most talented person is not necessarily the winner, to be mindful of the fact that the show apparently delivers a big boost to “dance sport” in this country. But I’d much prefer it if the dancing got treated with respect and a bit of seriousness. If the pros got to strut their stuff on an “individual couples” basis, rather than all the pros doing big group dances. And for goodness sake, show us the feet of the dancers – they are there to dance, at least show all of the dancer’s bodies, not just close ups of heads and backs. If within the weekend shows, there was a couple of minutes to explain what each dance is about, and what elements the judges are looking for. We don’t even get that much of that in It Takes Two any more. The BBC is supposed to entertain, educate and inform, and to do all three in this programme could be quite easy, if only some Executive Producer could see past the quick ratings grab of putting the younger female celebs in dresses that aren’t really there, relegating the men to “also rans” as much as possible, and writing off anyone female and over 40 as “obviously too tired and past it” whilst broadcasting a show that contains lots of sound cues and quick edits to appeal to an audience which is assumed to have the attention span of a nat. Then, maybe, we could get a show worthy of the BBC, and worthy to us as an audience.

SCD - The first weekend

And here we go, we’re under starter’s orders – and we’re off! Two shows, just about two hours of “live TV”, and judges scores which will rollover until next week, which will be the first time anyone is eliminated. It’s almost like they’re trying to get their money out of the celebs, and possibly suggests that the Pros have got their shit together on the collective bargaining front. 

Is this Live TV? I’m really not sure. The excellent Diamond Geezer just happened to be wandering past Television Centre on Saturday morning, and apparently saw the audience queuing some eight hours in advance, so it must have been, although this would have been easy to have done on a pre-record. Doing it actually live however gives the celebs a taste of the stress without it having any negative consequences for another week. 

Let’s talk about Tess’ dresses. Friday’s was nice. Actually *not awful*. It suited her and didn’t make her look fat. It was a purple short thing. I say short, I think it was just about skirting her arse. There was a bit of a sleeve, but all told, it was alright. Obviously, this couldn’t last, so on Saturday they put her in some gods awful black, slitty, short and long thing, that managed to make her look thin, and fat, tall and short and possibly almost tripped her up at one point. Seriously, what has Tess done to annoy the dressers and stylists?

No pro dances tonight, it’s just all pro-celeb couplings with training footage and crows nest based Tess interviews. No live music either, this is SCD pure and raw! 

And our first victim, sorry, competitor, is Holly Valance. The audience like her Cha Cha Cha, the judges give it 28 points. It wasn’t bad, but I’m not sure it was *that* good. I think she was probably very nervous (a trait in over supply over these two shows). Next up is Dan Lobb, this year’s recruit designed to encourage ITV to mention SCD in slightly complimentary tones. And oh. My. Word, he's got the blumin arch! The arch with the swing from last year? It's been resurrected (never say you don't get value for money from your licence fee!) but this time there's no swing, just a bench. It still looks daft though. Very, very daft. 

And then came Lulu and Brendan Cole. And it started so well, with a lot of show and flare. And then Lulu just completely forgot the choreography. Completely and totally, and unfortunately whilst she was on the opposite side of the dance floor from Brendan, who couldn’t even grab her into hold and do something with her. They got to the end of the music, and the scores should really have been better for the bit they managed to get through. 

From there we had the very tall Audley Harrison, followed by the very stompy Robbie Savage. You could see Robbie’s mind working overtime during the routine – “now my foot must be here, now Here, And Here, AND HERE”. If he gains some musicality, it might turn out OK. If he stays in that long. Then we were on to Anita Dobson, who is having the time of her life, and doesn’t care who knows about it. We finished the evening with Russell Grant, who I swear, was wearing glittery eye-shadow. He is also having tremendous fun, and this show should be all about that, people who have no dance background, getting out there, having fun, learning something and becoming better dancers. I worry that SCD, like so many other reality TV shows, is losing the focus on its original mission and becoming something, something different somehow, something of a soap opera, with a plotline, and a hero, a heroine, a comic relief, a villain.

Strictly Come Dancing - The Launch Show

Honestly - I've currently got a small back log of things either written or to write about. Let's start with a programme that was on the telly some three weeks ago, but which really got into it's stride this weekend: 

Oh goodness, I love “Strictly”. There was a moment in this opening episode when the Pros were all doing their thing, and I just sat on my sofa and wailed “it’s what I want to be doing”. Of course, I’d have to lose at least 4, maybe 5 Stone, gain some dance technique and find an extra day or two in the week. Oh, and if someone could find a way to take care of my mortgage and other bills, that would be helpful. But I digress, Strictly is back, from now to practically Christmas, and if the opener and the celebs this year are anything to go by, it should be a cracker.

Bruce and Tess are back, Bruce newly en-gonged with a long overdue Knighthood, and Tess in the usual god-awful outfit. Seriously, what the heck are the Beeb’s wardrobe department on? Tonight’s attempt was a canary yellow, all in one, floor length trouser suit thing. It managed to be too flow-y at the bottom, and too tight at the top, making the unfortunate Tess’ boobs look like they were being constricted by curious foundation garments and pushed and squeezed in all sorts of weird ways.

In many ways, this episode was something of a con. It was pre-recorded, on I think Wednesday this week, and we won’t get to see the couples dancing for a further three weeks. This was a teaser in many ways, of the treasures to come. And what can we deduce from this early glimpse at the celebs form?

Alex Jones (BBC’s The One Show) appears to have little to no sense of Rhythm. Russell Grant is really, really going for it. Fair play to him. He’s apparently lost ten stone in the last two years, and is doing this to get fit, according to his 24 second interview with Tess up in the crow’s nest. Jason Donovan is working his ass off, and Edwina Currie should not be under-estimated. Lulu has good stage presence (you’d be more surprised if she didn’t), Anita Dobson looks like she’s already having a wail of a time and Robbie Savage looks like he might actually be quite good. Holly Valance appears to have put weight on (but she works in Hollywood?!) All of them are, as ever, claiming to have never done anything like this before. This is plainly nonsense. One of them has had ballet lessons as a kid – a training which, if it was any good, will come in very useful here. Holly Valance has shaken her booty in a number of pop videos, and Jason Donovan – well, what can one say. 

I’ve seen Jason Donovan on the West End Stage in Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. He played the Dick van Dyke role – which requires you to dance (recall hazy memories of childhood bank holidays, and the deliberately-one-beat-behind-the-others genius that is “The Old Bamboo” - here's the Dick van Dyke version). Until recently (and he might still be, who knows?) he’s been in the tour of The Sound of Music, playing Captain Trapp, a role that requires ballroom dance ability in a pivotal romantic scene. He’s also recently spent a year playing “Tish” in the West End version of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. And from what I have seen of that on various late night charity tele-thons, there’s a good dance element to it. In short, the man is a leading Actor currently plying his trade in West End Musicals, and these days, that requires at the very least, movement in time to the rhythm of the music. He may well not win, as this is one of those shows which is all about a “journey” for the eventual victor, but I’ll personally be very disappointed if he doesn’t go quite some way in the competition (yes, OK, the 14 year old me has a massive crush on him – come on, I went to see Chitty Chitty Bang Bang – it wasn’t for the intriguing plot, was it?).

The pros tonight were on top form in a number of routines, including a sort of paso based thing with good use of chairs, and an excellent opening routine to “Born this Way” involving excellent use of canes and top hats. I love a good use of a prop, and that was what was going on here. Let’s hope that the pros don’t take this as an excuse to use weird props inappropriately during the competition dances (let’s try to forget that god awful sing thing that Aliona and Matt used last season). The first dance with the celebs at the end was a bit of a mess, but these things always are at this stage – come the final week re-cap they’ll all at least be in time and approaching being in rhythm – for now it was an acceptable glimpse and the three minutes upon which many of my above observations are based.

Roll on the end of the month and the series proper, I can’t wait, especially as, by my reckoning, it will be coming back fully just as Doctor Who is reaching the thrilling conclusion of Season 6.2.